I'm not usually late for anything. Then again, being late for me means only one thing: I have a little one that demands I not be late for her. Which means I'm mostly late for everything else. So here are my resolutions for 2012 noted on 1/12. I'm actually not that big into resolutions, its not because I don't believe in them, I'm just not great at follow through, at least not past January 2nd :-) But for the last few years I've wanted to do something new every year for myself, for I don't ever want to become stagnant. Three years ago it was becoming certified in Scuba. Last year it was running my first race; the half marathon. This year I'm running my first marathon and I will make a pie and enter it into my annual work pie contest. Let me tell you, it's big time. And while baking a pie might sound simple to all you domesticated cats. For me it's like operating a jet fighter; scary and with too many buttons (ingredients in this case). I think running the marathon will be easier. Trust me.
But that's not all. I want every year to carry a positive theme. Something inspiring to help shape me into a better person.
Last year I chose gratitude, even though I didn't set out for that. Don't you find that it's so easy to complain, so easy, like eating that second Reese peanut butter cup? I mean really, who eats just the one? But when life gets you down, like weeks of rainy weather, a non existent summer, struggling to lose all of your baby weight, finding that friends have forgotten about you, that family is so far away, that you don't have as much time or money. You get the idea. But really life is all about disappointments, and yet these disappointments are so ridiculously trivial to what goes on in other places and with other people. I'm embarrassed at times to even have moments of being ungrateful especially for all that I have in my life; a beautiful family, my health, safety, secure job, a warm home, the list goes on. So gratitude has helped me to refocus on everything I'm blessed with.
If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is "thank you," that would suffice.
Meister Eckhart
So this for this year, I want to slow. down. and enjoy.
I'm a go getter, always have been. I've always ran a tight ship in my life and in my home and I do so even more now that Lucia is here. I'm so incredibly anxious that everything will fall depart if I don't keep it up that I forget to breath, literally. Rush, rush, rush. All the dang time. And while I enjoy my time with Lucia tremendously, I know I need to stop rushing around her, fall to the floor, and just play. To take the time to breath in everything around me that is so precious; my family man husband, sweet Lucia, our furry child, my sanctuary of home, my family (even when far away), my friends that I still need today, my body for exercising and eating healthy, my work because it's been so good to me, and even slow down enough to cook and bake more. Ok lets be honest, that last one is a stretch ;-)
Life for me is wrapped up in so much and yet I find that I'm in such a rush to keep everything organized and squared away that I lose sight of what really matters; taking time to love others and myself too. Wouldn't it be shame to look back and not remember moments in my life? And instead remember how clean, organized, and on top of it i was? So I'm not going to let that happen to me. I'm going to remember holding my husbands hand on a rainy day walk, kissing my daughters fat cheeks over and over and over again, and watching in amusement as Bella tries to catch squirrels in the yard. We always tell her she did and that's ok, as long as she's happy ;-)
So here's to a brand new year 2012! A run, a pie, and lots of time for love. Sounds like a lot to be thankful for ;-)
